There are a couple of really good reasons for me to be thinking about love, marriage and all that mushy good stuff right now. Just a few weeks ago Hubs and I celebrated our 8th anniversary. Ahhh I can’t believe it’s been 8 years. It’s hard to remember a time when he wasn’t by my side.
This year when I was thinking of all the ways I love this awesome partner and friend of mine something really struck me. This is what I want for my kids. I want them to be loved, respected and supported. I want them to search out and require a healthy love. For them to know how to be a spouse and to feel as loved as I do.
There are some little ways we can make sure our message of love is received loud and clear.
5 ways to teach kids about healthy marriage
1. Make alone time a priority. That doesn’t have to mean a big night out on the town (although it can. ;)). Alone time can be as simple as having the kids play in their rooms before bed. We call it bedroom rest time and make it clear that it is as important for them as well as for us. It’s okay… and beneficial to say “Dad and I want some adult time. So we can spend time together by ourselves.” Let them know that husband-wife time is just as important to you as the time you spend with them.
2. Be affectionate. Cuddle, hug, hold hands and even kiss in front of the kids. They love hugs and snuggles… it’s an important part of the connection we make as parents. And it’s an important part of the connection we make as a couple.
3. Tell the kids how great he is. Make a point to share what makes you swoon. I’m a big advocate of speaking up, especially in a positive way. If I notice that Hubs did something extra special I shout it out. It can be as simple as him helping with unexpected extra chore or a comment he made that brought a smile to your face. Remember to tell them how it makes you feel. (It’s also great if they overhear you actually giving the praise to your love.)
4. Disagree in front of them once in a while. I know, I know… you’ve heard a hundred times that you should not fight in front of the kids. I agree with that. BUT we are not perfect and we do not agree all the time. A healthy marriage is not one that only consists of smiles and laughs. There are times when you don’t see eye to eye and letting the kids see a HEALTHY, calm disagreement will show them how to argue respectfully.
5. Give each other little gifts of love (and let the kids help). Make notes to put in his lunch box or under his pillow. While it will let the kids show him some love it also shows that putting a little smile on his face is important to you.
What tips for teaching kids about healthy marriage would you add? Let us know in comment section.